Groundhog Day as a BCS Nightmare
You wake up, it’s cold, you’re in a somewhat familiar bed and it’s playing again. “I Got You, Babe”. “The Hell?,” you think, “these idiots played this song yesterday morning”.
Here we are in Punxsutawney again. That damn BCS gopher is about to let us know that bowl season will suck again this year. We’re about to run into that asshole Ned Ryerson who will be totally excited about the LSU/Alabama matchup which leads to our plunging our foot straight into an icy puddle. The letdown here is we don’t get to deck that bald buffoon.
Somehow I wake up every year hoping I won’t hear that damned song. Just remember that it doesn’t matter. Every year you’re going to wake up, hear those stupid morning DJ’s playing that same BCS song, BCS Andie MacDowell is going to reject your advances and slap you in the face, and that damn BCS gopher is going to drive your college football season pickup right into a giant pit.
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I tried to get myself away from this nonsense. I tried to immerse myself in baseball. Their structure is pretty flawed, but not even Bud Selig on quaaludes could imagine a subjective nightmare like the BCS.
Surely, in a sport as popular as college football, a team that didn’t even win its own division couldn’t appear in a national title game. I mean, there are 120 some odd teams. Couldn’t we pick a team that won its own conference? Don’t get me wrong, the SEC is a ridiculously good conference. But how much better can it be when Alabama only beat two ranked teams?
Forget the obvious national title game matchup (that I’ll again be boycotting), look at the Cotton Bowl. Then look at the Sugar Bowl. Which game offers a better matchup?
Once again we are faced with a subjective, terrible system. And what can we do about it? Nothing. College Football has shown that it doesn’t care what you think. It knows it has you by the gonads. They know how loyal you are to your team.
“What are you gonna do, sport?”, they might be saying. “You gonna watch the FCS playoff? We both know that’s a far better system with a true champion, but we care more about money, money and money to even consider something that actually resembles a definitive championship.”
Inevitably, we’re collectively to blame. We continue to consume the product and its sponsor. We vent on twitter, facebook and amongst friends and quiet down. Then we wake up the next year to Sonny and Cher.
Dr. Vox Humana
@drvoxhumana
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